How many of us embrace the opportunity to love our enemies? I mean “love” as a verb, not an emotion. I have walked a long trail that has given me opportunity to learn and live this out. I have not always succeeded. In fact, the first few years were horrible. I dealt with so much anxiety that I was truly tormented. There was troubled and fleeting sleep and perseveration while awake.
One of the things God showed me was that I turned a person and an entire situation into an idol. I always thought of an idol as something or someone with whom or which I was enamored; but that simply wasn’t true in my case. What a mental bombshell that revelation was to me.
I have great, godly love and support from family and the closest of friends; but I wasn’t turning everything, including myself over to God….Huge mistake! God loves in the verb sense and has good plans for us (Jeremiah 29:11); and He chastens those He loves (Proverbs 3:12) to grow us and ready us to help others. But oh, I had an extremely difficult time surrendering my way and clearing the path of my own methods and thoughts so that He could act.
He was and is graciously kind to remind me to surrender. Along the way, He revealed to me that I’m not in control anyway. The perception that I was in charge, was simply an illusion. I was merely exhausting myself by pursuing something false.
Lord, may I surrender to You daily and watch as Your ways amaze and astound me (Isaiah 55:8-9). Amen.